Been a while

Upsetting event: Was debating on newwinnipeg.com and read an article about urban sprawl which mentioned the oil peak. Heart started pounding.

Feelings: Anxiety, nervousness, fear, shame that I'm still afraid of this old fear.

Automatic thoughts -

1. If we don't do something now, our society will collapse and we'll all suffer horribly - 70 - 20
2. Our society will irrepairably damage the earth and we'll kill ourselves in the process - 50 - 20
3. Everything I've worked hard for will disappear - 70 - 30
4. I'm living my life wrong and wasting things I don't need to - 80 - 30

Rational Responses:

1. We are doing something now. We know that this can't continue and new technologies are being explored and tested to help us get off of fossil fuels. We're starting to recognize that we can't continue to eat and live the way we do, and we're making changes. Since changes don't happen overnight, it's hard to see the benefits of what we're changing right now, but I have faith it will happen. - 70
2. The earth has proven time and time again that she can heal herself, even after catastrophic events. I see evidence of this every time a blade of grass pushes up through the cement towards sunlight. We are affecting the earth, but there is a movement now to save it. - 80
3. It won't disappear, it will change. And really, what I really want is to be happy, not material possessions. -80
4. I might be living my life wrong, but no one can tell me that but myself. I am making changes and I'm proud of that fact. I will continue to make changes until I have the life I want - one full of happiness, responsibility for others and myself. - 70

My heart has stopped pounding. It's hard to look at things in a positive light when you're so afraid. Fear is really the most frightening thing on the planet.